The Story of Three Boys and a UK Interview
I am preparing for the month of Ramadan. This means I'm trying to curtail my social media usage, align my reading with suitable content, and prepare myself mentally and physically. There are many Muslims apps out there, but I've found most to be too heavy on ads. Therefore, I use a combination of three apps that are ad free; Pillars (prayer times and qiblah), Quran, and Muhammadan Way (dhikrs, duah, hadith, etc).
I'll leave you with the story of three men who I knew as kids.
The first man was known on the streets as “Looney”. In other words, he had a reputation for being crazy. He was a member of the Bloods street gang most of his life. As teenagers we were friends and arrested together. I lost touch with Looney long ago. One of the blessings of Islam is that it gave me better and more positive friendships. A couple of weeks ago Looney was on the news (again). This time it was report that he had been shot and killed in Ferguson.
Looney was smart. We had intelligent conversations. He respected Islam and Christianity, but said that being a Blood was the most important thing to him and believed that it was aligned with the African tradition of tribes and warfare. Despite his intelligence, Looney never overcame the street life and I'm told he developed a serious heroin addiction. As word of his death spread, reaction was either “I'm surprised he was still alive” or “I'm surprised he wasn't in prison”.
Sean was a wrestling teammate of mine and his dad, a hall of fame coach, actually coached me in freestyle. I randomly ran into Sean and his brother leaving the Missouri vs. Oklahoma State wrestling dual meet a couple of weeks ago. We had a brief conversation, and I don't know the details of his life, and I'm sure there have been highs and lows, but he seemed solid, happy, and in good health.
Seeing Sean made me think two moments from his dad. Once I was sitting near his dad and watching wrestling in Granite City, Illinois and I asked him if his son would go to college. He was flabbergasted and replied that “all of my kids will go to college”. This may seem normal to many readers, but it was far from uniform in the time and place I grew-up as union jobs, blue-collar careers, small business ownership, and the military were often prized over academic achievement.
The last time I'd seen Sean he lost a heartbreaking match. His dad didn't cry, nor did he, and he didn't have any harsh words. He just said “you want a hot dog? Go get a hot dog?” in a gentle manner. It was a way men of that generation could tell their boys they loved and cared about them without being overly emotional.
I can't help but to think that if Looney had a man like Sean's dad in his life things would've turned out much differently.
Lastly we could come to Tony. Or even Ricky. Ricky was strung out on heroin for years. In and out of jail and near death's door. He found a program and turned his life around. I met him during his brief stint as a Muslim years ago. Tony is still a Muslim- and in prison in Illinois. He called me this week asking if I could help him find housing near Carbondale, Illinois and help him with a release plan and I told him I would. Why Carbondale? He wants to study law there. This will be one of my Ramadan projects. If you'd like to assist with this effort please get in touch.
Some are blessed with generational resources that go far beyond any material wealth. This is rooted in family, faith, and values and creates a solid foundation. Others may struggle to find such firm footing, but if they are taking forward steps we should work to meet them along their route.
I'm sharing below the recent episode I did with the wonderful and informative YouTube Channel and podcast Skepislamica. I hope you find this conversation as informative as I did.